The Little Things that Matter – #10 – Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye to a family member is never easy. A young cousin at 35 years old passed last Saturday and he was laid to rest last Wednesday at their family’s mausoleum.

Until now I am at awe at how much courage my 74 year old Aunt had when she discovered her son lying lifeless at the shower. She called me from her mobile phone and asked me to come to her home immediately. This was my cousin’s second heart attack and unfortunately I think it was a massive attack. He manifested all the signs of a severe attack when I saw him.

Since we are a big family, every cousin was within our Aunt’s home in less than an hour volunteering to do anything that has to be done. One cousin even said that we already have our own emergency response team. The nurses from the ambulance service that we called had it easy since they had all the assistance they needed to transfer our cousin from the bathroom to his bedroom and this was also true with the funeral service crew.

I was never close to my cousin, we had a 10 year age gap. Age difference I guess, but we respected each other and tried our best to stay cool. He was the joker in the family, tried to make everyone laugh to their heart’s content and had the most wacky shots. We celebrate our birthdays on the same month and most times he beats even my husband to greet me on my big day. Two years ago, when my Mother was very sick, he was the one who looked for a priest for my Mother to have her last rites. He was also a big help when my Mother passed. He truly was one of the most valuable team member of our family’s emergency response team. Each cousin had a memorable experience with him and we all shared those stories on the last day of his wake.

I only hope that sharing good memories of each other will be a regular thing in my family. We all say thank you, we all give each other big hugs, we all show each other we love one another but it is only during wakes and funerals that we look back, reminisce each other’s good deeds, great work, memorable situation. I hope we can all develop the habit of saying these applause when the person is still living.

Goodbye Ocho. You are in the safest and merriest place now.

 

 

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8 thoughts on “The Little Things that Matter – #10 – Saying Goodbye

  1. So sorry to hear about your loss Carrie. How wonderful that you have a big family to help each other through and share your memories. My family had a bit of a scare last Friday with my husband. He’s fine now, but it does remind you that you should never take anything for granted and show your love everyday.

  2. I am very sorry for your loss. It’s a terrible shock when someone dies suddenly and never more so than when they are so young. My oldest brother died at 41 from a heart attack so I write that with some insight. You write beautifully about the way such a tragedy pulls family together and reaffirms bonds and connections just as one has been so terribly severed. You have my condolences and I wish you and your family gentle days ahead. Xxx

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