I think I have saved the best of my flower angel series for this week. I started loving stargazer lilies when a suitor gifted me with a flower bouquet of it a long time ago. Other than the rose, the stargazer lily is one flower I associate with love. So for this week, I drew and colored a whimsical girl wearing a bandana with a stargazer lily petal as wings. I am dedicating this girl to all the mothers who have won and lost their battle with the big ‘c’ and to those who are still fighting.
Back in 2007 I have been diagnosed with cancer and had undergone operation and radiation. My parents went through the same journey but lost in 2006 and 2014. Many will will say that if anyone could choose to have cancer they will choose to have papillary thyroid cancer, which what I had back then. It was the highest rate of survival especially when detected early on. But in all considerations, even with papillary thyroid cancer, I did not want any of it at all. I was confined for a week and when I had my radiation treatment a month later, I was told not to share a bedroom, toilet and bath with anyone, not to get pregnant for a year and that I should not go near pregnant women, elderly people and babies for a whole month. Check ups every month until I celebrated my one year and every three months thereafter. Only in 2012 was I told that I could have my check ups and blood tests twice a year. So basically even if I was afflicted with the highest rate of survival kind of cancer, it was still a pain and whats worst, I became afraid of the one place I used to love.
I grew up in a home adjacent to a hospital. My grandfather was a doctor who built his own hospital and grew that hospital with his doctor children. So when I grew up I also wanted to be a doctor but subsequently plans changed and I became a nurse. When I graduated and started working, I loved every minute of my time inside the hospital with all the chaos and emotions. Cancer changed all that.
In hindsight, though I’m not a mother, I also dedicate this angel to the journey I went through battling cancer and finally claim I am a survivor. Embracing my scar and loving it.